Torture

Everyone who has ever watched a war movie knows sleep deprivation can be used as a form of torture. I am beginning to believe my children are actually double agents intent on bringing me to the brink of insanity. Every night someone is either in my bed or standing by my bed looking at me creepily like the girl in Poltergeist or waking me up at 5:15 and asking if it's time to wake up. I spend an inordinate amount of time trying to figure out why I won't exercise and eat right. True, part of it is just the need for me to kick me in the ass and say, "Go out there and do it without making up some really elaborate excuse." But part of it is the complete and utter lack of anything resembling quality sleep since the birth of my youngest four years ago. I find I cannot remember words anymore. And not in that, oh it's on the tip of my tongue but my brain is just too overloaded to think of it now. More like, I have absolutely no idea what I'm trying to say but I know there should be words for it. It's one big circle of exhaustion and excuses and eating. All E's all the time! But I either live with it and keep going, as any overachieving mother would, or give in and go to sleep for the next few years.

Slipping

Wow, imagine that. I have been backsliding a little (lot). I think if I go back and read the entries from the beginning I would find a pattern of behavior. And if I could just break the code on that I would save us all a lot of time and energy. After the tri I took a break and then I got some nasty stomach virus. And then I was lazy. But I begged, BEGGED, my neighbor to please, please run with me. And today she finally relented (mostly to shut me up). She is a trooper because if I had not been running and attempted to run, at any pace, I would just throw up and fall down on the sidewalk. But she did not. And it was good for me. Because I had to slow down. And I actually enjoyed it! I enjoyed not feeling like my lungs were going to explode like a too full bellows. I enjoyed not stumbling and bumbling forward in pain. I actually can run slower and still be running. So hopefully this will help me over the mental block of 3 miles. I.just.can't.seem.to.make.myself.do.it. But maybe I can do it slower! (That's what she said.) Sorry. I haven't had my full caffeine ration. Just suffice it to say I am slowing down to get back on track. And back on track I will be!

Swiss chard...how I love thee.

I am inundated with winter/early spring vegetables from my CSA (community supported agriculture) weekly delivery. There's only so much you can do with turnips and radishes. Winter is a lean season for produce, even here in sunny AZ. But there's one vegetable that continues to amaze and delight. Yes, Swiss chard. I'm not a picky eater and I love trying new things. Yet I had never sampled Swiss chard before. Admittedly my family will not be tempted. That just leaves more for me. Apparently Swiss chard is a "vegetable valedictorian," whatever that means. I suppose it's the head of its class or something. I was going to list the benefits of Swiss chard but they were too numerous and I am lazy so I'll include a link. Below you will find two delightful recipes:

My most favorite recipe comes from AllRecipes. It's sauteed Swiss chard with parmesan cheese. So good. I would start with this one if you are unfamiliar with or hesitant to try the chard.

The second is a recipe from my CSA box:

Tangy Swiss Chard with Slivered Carrots

1/4 cup olive oil
2 large carrots (3/4 pound) halved lengthwise and thinly sliced on the diagonal
4 pounds Swiss chard, stems chopped, leaves cut into 1 inch strips
2 tablespoons rice wine vinegar
Kosher salt and freshly ground pepper

Heat the olive oil in a very large skillet. Add the carrots and cook over moderately high heat until crisp tender, about 3 minutes. Add the chard stems and cook for 1 minute, then stir in the chard leaves and toss until wilted, about 3 minutes. Stir in the rice vinegar, season with salt and pepper and serve.

Hopefully these recipes will make you a Swiss chard lover too. Now if I could just figure out how to love turnips.

Heart Rate Training

OK I am back from my "rest week." I had every intention of working out at least three times last week but I suffered a little on the follow through. I ran once. And it was hard. I just wanted to take a nap. And then I took my kids to a local fun run/walk and it was hard (for different reasons) and again I wanted to nap. So nap training went well. But now I'm back on my training plan (that keeps changing). I think I am signing up for another sprint towards the end of May so I have to at least make some effort to continue swimming. I'm also getting a little coaching with that. Let's cross our fingers. The May sprint is bike heavy (15 miles) so I should probably ride some too. And then I think I'm free from triathlon aspirations until possibly September. I will let you in on a little secret. Won't really be a secret after I post it for anyone to see. But I have little faith in the existence of readers for this blog so I might as well be telling it to the dog. Because he's a good listener. OK, enough. I am thinking, thinking, thinking about doing the PF Chang's Marathon in January. Does it matter that I can only run less than 3 miles? No, because I have 40 weeks and my best friend Hal Higdon. I am going to do his "spring training" plan first to prepare. It actually only lasts for 12 weeks but I'm going to stretch that out to 22. You run 4 days a week, as opposed to my current 3 (ahem 1-2) and start with smaller times. I was almost giddy at the thought of only running a mile and a half today. Imagine me being giddy at the prospect of physical exertion (never mind that the primary reason was my happiness at not having to go farther). Which brings us to the point of this post - heart rate training.

If you read any books about triathlon (and probably running, biking and swimming alone) you'll notice a huge emphasis on training in your aerobic zone. This kind of makes it necessary to use a heart rate monitor. I have a Garmin with a heart rate monitor but I remember not liking it very much the first time I used it. I had been using Polar until that point and I really liked the accuracy of the Polar. But I refuse to wear two gadgets on my wrist. So today I sucked it up and wore the Garmin. It seemed to be pretty consistent so I'll begrudgingly give it a second chance. But here's the issue. I'm pretty sure my heart rate is way faster than the recommended zones allow. I don't mean I'm working harder than I should. I mean my heart rate is just way high (and yes, that is a technical/medical diagnosis). Some of you may remember (probably not) my visit to the cardiologist, which was prompted by just this issue. You see, I started wearing a heart rate monitor during running and instantly scared the bejeezus out of myself when my heart rate was in the 180s. But I didn't feel winded or like I was pushing too much. So I never would have known had I not had the Polar. But I went to get it checked out anyway. You know, so I wouldn't just keel over one day. And the cardiologist pronounced me healthy. Yeah. So my conundrum (50 point word for the day) is how to adjust my heart rate zones for my higher heart rate. And don't tell me to slow down. Because "running" at 13 minute miles is not really feasible. I can do 12 minute miles. But my heart rate is in the 170s. If anyone has any really great advice please let me know. And by anyone, I mean me. Or possibly my mother or the couple of friends who read this.

And if you're interested in your "zones" you can use the Maffetone method where you subtract your age from 180. This supposedly gives you your max aerobic heart rate, which is laughable because mine is 142. You can also use the 220 minus your age and multiply by the percentages for your aerobic and anaerobic zones. But you'll have to look that one up because I'm too lazy to find the specifics. So much for helpful fitness blog.

Tri for the Cure

My very first triathlon has come and gone. I went in knowing I could do it. Biking the 8 miles and running 2.5 a few times eased my mind. But I was afraid of the unknown. If you have issues with insomnia before a race I highly recommend waking up really early the morning before the race and going for your first ever open water swim and one mile run up a hill the size of Mt. Everest. And then race around for the rest of the day attending a home sales party and packet pick up. By about 10-11 you will beg to go to sleep.

I set my alarm for 5:00 because I could not imagine waking up earlier. 5:00 is kind of my limit. I had packed all my essentials the night before in a very obsessive organized way. So all I had to do Sunday was dress, get coffee and water bottles. There was a tense moment when I discovered my frozen water bottle had tipped over and sealed the top on. I managed to unscrew it though and add water to top it off. Whew. The drive over was pretty uneventful. I started worrying about the time it was taking me though and wondering if all the good spots would be gone. Should not have worried. Apparently a lot of people don't like to come early. I set up my bike and transition area on an outside rack and noted the flower balloon to make sure I would remember where in the hell my bike was. I myself am way too cool to bring balloons for the rack but in the future I will make sure to always rack my bike by someone who brings one!

I waited around a long time for the swim start. Since it was in a pool they sent off swimmers every 15 seconds. Finally I was standing in line at the edge of the pool and I started wondering exactly why I had signed up for the race. My nerves were eased a bit by Sara and her wonderful cheering family. I started the swim and quickly realized I had forgotten how. Why were my arms flailing around? Why were my legs dragging the bottom? I don't know what happened but that was possibly the worst swim of my life (as well as the longest 15 minutes). I just could not get a rhythm going and then I would get to the end of the lane and have to go under the lane line. But I made it! I was passed by a lot of people. I felt like the little cork in the swim lane stopping up the flow. I tried to stay far right. I almost got kicked by a woman doing breaststroke. Aahhh the joy of triathlon.

I tried to hurry through transition. I felt like I was hurrying. But perhaps I was not. There's definitely a learning curve and I would do some things different. Like not wear socks, which are really hard to pull on wet feet. I was looking forward to the bike all morning. I just kept thinking I would go really hard on the bike no matter what. I finally made my way onto the course and started pedaling. I felt really good at first and didn't have a hard time maintaining my goal pace of 16 mph. I even rode a little faster. Passed some people. Got passed by a few. One ridiculous lady with a time trial helmet and tri bike. Really? In an 8 mile bike? She probably finished in like 15 minutes though. So it was going along. And then I turned a corner and the wind started blowing. I kept shifting to see if spinning made it easier but no, it didn't. I just kept spinning. Just keep spinning, spinning, spinning. I made it around the course twice though and back to transition. My Garmin said exactly 30 minutes for a little over 8 miles. My recorded bike time was 36 minutes though (which included both transitions) so I see where I have a little work to do.

Setting off for the run I just kept telling myself I only had 2.5 miles to go. Possibly less. Apparently one thing said 2 and one thing said 2.5. I was hoping for the 2. In describing the run course, the race director kept saying, "You'll run around that HUGE facility," which didn't really help. The first lap I didn't take any water because 1. it's hard to run and drink and 2. it makes me burpy, which makes me feel like hurling. I just kept trudging along. I swear, I don't know if my feet really even leave the ground. I know I need to work on raising my knee but that makes it harder!! But I didn't stop! I kept looking down at my Garmin and it would say I was going faster than my goal pace. I didn't want to lose my steam so I would slow down a little. Maybe I shouldn't do that. Maybe I should run until I puke? I don't know. On the second lap I did take water and I squeezed the cup like I was supposed to. Still really hard to drink. I finally saw the entrance to the track and told myself it was almost over. My kids were all there at the entrance and they high fived me as I went past. I cannot tell you how motivating that was. Plus they had music so I didn't have to just listen to my ragged breathing. I finished the first lap and looked down at my Garmin, which read 1.8 something. I assumed I had to do another lap because the instructions about the laps were a little fuzzy. I started running on the outside of the chute and luckily Sara and her husband were yelling and pointing for me to go on the inside. So I did. But I felt like I was cheating. Plus, anticlimactic. I was mentally prepared to go around again. And the one race snafu of the day - the loss of my race belt - meant they didn't call my name because I didn't have my number on. We did find my race belt hanging on a rack in transition and apparently one side had pulled out of the buckle. Stupid race belt. Anyway, as soon as I finished (and neurotically flagged down a race volunteer to make sure I had completed the assigned laps) I felt like I could take on the world. I wasn't tired or nauseous. I just felt empowered. So I ate a banana. And then I made my family take me to IHOP. I thought I would eat my whole plate plus some but I couldn't even finish 1/3 of my pancakes and omelet. But not to worry, I took it home for later!

So what have I learned? No, it's not to never do another triathlon again. I quite like the feeling. I love walking around after with my number marking. I love not feeling sore the next day and knowing it's because I trained and ate right. I love feeling like I can improve my times and do better. I think I'm going to do another pool swim sprint next month. Not quite ready for open water. I will definitely be working on my swim. I'm going to get some coaching. I'll practice transitions. I'll figure out how to use my Garmin in multisport mode. I'll double check my race belt. And I will for sure be out there again.

Wetsuits..and hilarity ensues

Last night I had the pleasure of trying on a wetsuit. If you've never experienced this particular undertaking, well, good for you. It is most unpleasant. No amount of jumping up and down or praying to a higher power will get that rubber monstrosity over your hips. You finally resort to inching it up centimeter by centimeter until you just go for it and thrust your arms into the sleeves. By now you are hunched over because the crotch is around your knees. This requires the help of at least one other person. And then they will laugh at you and say it's like dressing a penguin. And then you'll laugh because you're just so fricking happy the thing zipped up. And then you'll marvel at your physique because you are packed in like a neoprene bomb. Some repetitive rubbing of the sleekness might be in order. And then you have to take it off. Much easier than putting it on but you are deathly afraid of ripping a hole in the fabric. And amazed at the amount of sweat you've generated in 10 minutes. You decide to buy one to wear around the house, sort of like a homemade sauna. But it's a little expensive. And will you really use it? But as you stroke it longingly you calculate how many uses you could get out of it. You mention that you feel really close to the suit because you've been through so much together. And you're kind of skeeved out by the thought of buying a used wetsuit because you've seen first hand the damage one sweaty body can do in a relatively short time. So, buy or not buy. That is the question.

I'm Doing It!

Sometimes when I'm swim/bike/run-ing I literally stop in amazement. As you can imagine that is particularly difficult in the pool. But I manage to tread water while patting myself on the back. I cannot tell you how much different I feel about this endeavor than any other I have attempted before. I don't know if that sentence makes sense or not because I cannot concentrate due to the loud volume of The Princess and The Frog in the other room. Back to my point. I have done things I am proud of - the 5K, walking a half marathon, The 3 Day. But I think I always doubted my ability to accomplish them. I know I can finish the triathlon. I won't be first but I think I can come close to my goals. And I know I can finish. In the end that's the most important. Last year I backed out of a mini sprint because I had serious psychological doubts. But this time I have trained quite a bit and I feel really positive. I'm working on some competitiveness issues I have, which is actually quite helpful because I've finally figured out that it's MY RACE. I'm not trying to beat anyone but my own negative self image. And when I do I'm gonna be a sore winner and say, "In your face negative self image." That is probably really therapeutic. I suggest you try it.